Seizing the moment, Northfield’s Defeat of Jesse James Days committee announced on Thursday that it was pursuing actress Sandra Bullock to be a featured celebrity at this year’s event. A significant number of other notable women could join her.
“But we realized that women everywhere could be very attracted to a festival that celebrates the defeat of a just-as-despicable 21st century Jesse James.”
“And what could be better than having Sandra Bullock and all the other women who’ve been given tours of his monster garage come to Northfield? I’m not exactly sure what a re-enactment might look like, though one can image some possibilities involving a vanilla gorilla, that sort of thing.”